Dear Big Brother

Hi,
It's your little sister. I don't know if you get letters in Heaven, or wherever you may be. I found out you left today. It hurts. I always wanted to see you. I always wondered where you were, what you were doing, and how life was treating you.
I'm going to take a guess that life wasn't that kind to you. You see, we are the same, and throughout the years we were apart I figured you probably had a hard time with things. There are events that happen in life that get engraved in our memories. They follow us wherever we go and no matter how hard we try to fight it, they continue haunting us.

I wish I could have been there for you. I want you to know that no matter how far away you were, I always loved you and I still do. You're the only big brother I've had and I cherish the memories we have. I want you to know that because during the hard times, we forget that people love us because we're in so much pain.
You see, I tried to end it all in 2008. I struggled with depression throughout my childhood and into adulthood. I let it consume me until I realized that I was hurting everyone more than I was hurting myself. It makes me sad knowing that you were probably hurting all alone. I don't know for sure but I feel like you were. Nobody should have to feel that way. Nobody should make others feel that way either. I don't know how you passed away, but please know I'm only sad because I love you so much and I miss you very much. Whatever happened, don't blame yourself. Just focus on finding peace and holding onto it. Nothing can hurt you now. I look forward to the day we meet again.. Where I can be your little sister and give you a big hug and let you know that you've been missed for. Very very long time.
I want you to smile, big brother. I will never ever forget you.

Love, your little sister.

P.S: I still have some of your Lego.